As graduation day creeps closer for our final-year students at Kingston University, many are taking time to reflect not only on their achievements, but also opportunities that slipped through their fingers. Missed social events and academic risks never taken, a common theme is emerging among third years: regret can be one of university’s most unexpected lessons.
For journalism student Thea Antoniou, her biggest regret isn’t academic, it’s living with her ex-boyfriend, where she spent too much time with him: “I spent all of second year living with him, and from now being away from that, I realise how badly he impacted my life. I lost friends because of it, and worst of all, lost my spark.”
For Antoniou, the difficult experience ultimately became a lesson in self-worth and resilience, one that she believes she might never have learned without leaving home. She has now learnt, “to always listen to your gut when something feels wrong. And when you want to leave, make that leap, as hard as it may be, and leave.”
Students also mentioned the feeling of regret when it came to friendships and the way in which they handled themselves over the years. One student said: “I messed up on a friendship because I was naïve and immature back then, if I can handle things more subtly, we would still be good friends.”
When asked what they would do differently, they said: “I think before you say or do, there are things that cannot be undone. Don’t let emotions drive you.”
Others echoed similar sentiments, particularly around how they approached their first year.
“Being a commuter, I felt like I missed out on so much compared to all my classmates who collectively lived at Seething Wells,” one respondent said.
When asked what advice they would have wanted to hear in first year, they added, “To not take everything so seriously. First year is about getting to know yourself rather than being an academic weapon, that can wait for third year.”
Several students admitted they avoided joining societies, applying for internships, or even speaking up in seminars during their first two years, often due to fear of failure. Now, with deadlines for dissertations looming and graduation close by, many say they are only just finding their voice.
One student told us, “One regret I have is not broadening my social horizons as much as I could have. I didn’t join the Christian society: I could have made Christian friends to have fellowship with.”
When asked what they would do differently, they told us, “Stay in accommodation, despite my parents bombarding me and arguing with me about it constantly, and join the Christian society. You need your own space.”
Despite these reflections, many final year students emphasise that regret is not purely negative. Instead, it serves as a powerful tool for growth. For many, the lessons learned from missed chances may prove just as valuable as the successes they celebrate on graduation day.
